Excited, scared, anxious!

I didn't think it was possible to feel as many different emotions as I am right now. To feel so many different emotions at once can be a bit overwhelming. There are moments where I will just get scared or just get excited but usually I'm feeling many different things at the same time. I know no one died from feeling but it is new to me. I'm trying hard as I can from just diving into my old habits of eating to help me through the emotions. Instead I am just dealing with them and boy it is hard. Now... it is only hard because it is new to me. I'm sure with time it will get easier. I'm trying to keep my head in a positive place. I know if I let it I can totally drive myself nuts and end up in a mental ward. I know I could scare myself out of having the surgery. But I am thinking about the positive outcome, envisioning my new life and I am keeping myself centered. Also, a lot of meditation helps as well. Something new I am doing to keep me centered and also gives me a chance to search within my soul and then do some praying as well. All good stuff.

I'm working on the balance thing as well. I feel as if things are a little crazy right now. I feel so busy, busier than my usual busy. I know it is probably a blessing as I'm sure if I wasn't busy I would drive myself crazy. So I guess it is good. I just need to find a good balance. I love my water aerobics but they take a lot out of me. Not only energy but time. It is time consuming. From the time I leave work until I get home from the gym it is about 3 hours which is a lot of time! I'm trying to shorten that time, if possible. Again it is just finding that balance. It feels good and I do need the exercise so I am not going to stop doing it but just gotta figure other things out. Sometimes work does just get in the way. Who knows maybe I will become independently wealthy and be able to help others and be a personal trainer. Me? Hmmm... kind of a wild dream but I do know many people that have become something they never dreamed possible. So I don't say never... you know the saying never say never.

Alrighty, I needed to ramble. I have workouts Tuesday - Thursday so probably won't be around again until after that. Hugs to you all!