Monday, August 23, 2010

My Health Stewardship 8.23.10

I must say I am really disappointed in the scale right now. In the last two weeks I have gained 11 pounds! I’m supposed to be going the other way! UGGGHHH! Can you say frustrating!?

So I admit I have been slightly confused. I received some information and watched a video on how carbs are good for us and how bad animal protein is for us. So I was considering going on a vegetarian and possibly vegan diet. I was really pumped for it actually. I talked with our group facilitator and if I have the surgery that won’t be possible. Due to the re-routing I need lots of protein and the only way to get that much protein is from animal protein. So prior to that I had been slowly adding carbs into my diet and reducing protein. Well apparently that is not working for me. So I am back to my plan when I was losing weight. High protein and low carbs. The other problem is I haven’t been doing as many shakes because I haven’t ordered anymore. So I will be placing an order tonight.

My exercise is lacking too. Mid-week last week I got this HUGE knot/cramp/excruciating pain in my knee and calf and could literally barely walk from point A to point B let alone get in some extra walking. I’m so frustrated at this point. I want to exercise but my knee is holding me back. So it is back to doing the wii sports and getting in anything extra I can.

I finally got the results of my x-rays on my knees and I have degenerative arthritis. I also have some bone spurs. Yes, it is most likely caused by my weight I understand this. No wonder my knees so hurt so much! So yet another reason for me to get this weight off. The good news is I start physical therapy on Wednesday. I am scared because I know they really work you and I don’t know if I am ready for that but as long as it makes my knee stronger and feel better in the long run then I am all for it!

I continue to focus on my goals. My big goal is going to Hawaii. When I lose all my weight (when I get to my goal weight of 200 that is) River is taking me to Hawaii. I continually imagine myself healthy looking and on the beach relaxing (extra skin and all). But it is something I definitely look forward too since I haven’t been there (I haven’t traveled much which is on my list of things to do once I am able).

I am considering getting a life coach. I had one once before for about 3 weeks and I did find it helpful. I think a life coach could help me focus on my goals and help me with my balance of life. If anyone has any recommendations they would be appreciated.

Thank you all for your love and support it is greatly appreciated. Don’t worry I haven’t given up and I know it is a new week and a new day, etc. But it is frustrating when you do think you are being “good” and don’t get those results. I also know that it has been quite warm so it could all be water weight (which is what my hope is). So let’s just hope next week I have a weight loss because I will be working extra hard for it this week.

Monday, August 9, 2010

My Health Stewardship 8.9.10

So do you ever feel confident and then at the very last second before you are about to give a speech, take a test, or get on the scale (as in my case) all of a second you are second-guessing every single thing you are doing? Maybe I should have ate that, maybe I should have ate that, maybe I should have done more exercise. Oh well, I probably gained, I worked hard but with my luck I gained. Whereas, just a few minutes before things were great. You were confident that you were going to lose. You were confident you did everything to the best of your ability. Yeah, I don't like those little voices in my head. Most of the time they are annoying and those voices are usually the negative ones in my life. Or they are the ones that react out of fear and thus have led me to where I am today. All my decisions in the past have been based out of fear. I didn't do that because I was afraid, I didn't do that because I was afraid. Well screw fear! I have NO FEAR. Ok, well I am not quite there yet but I am starting to make some decisions that aren't based on fear! That is progress for me.

So after all that ramble... I get on the scale and low and behold... I lost 6 pounds for the week. Just by eating right and exercising. Can you believe it!? I can! I worked hard this week. I am really proud of the changes I am making. Lots of changes right now. Work, personal life, socially... all good things though.

I am being me for once and taking care of me and showing myself I can maintain the balance that makes me, me and that ME comes first! I love me! *chuckle*

Thanks for listening to my ramble! Have a good day, better yet, have a wonderful week!

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

My Health Stewardship 8.3.10

Dear Friends and Family,

I am going to skip my video today because I am really tired and I am not feeling all that well. But I did want to give a brief update.

So I shockingly lost another 2 pounds. Now, I only say I am shocked because well to be honest… it is that time of the month (sorry guys) and I feel like I gained 500 pounds. Of course I am exaggerating but I felt sooooooo bloated! So I actually set myself up to expect a gain. In fact I usually look at my slip right away after it prints out (it prints out instead of display on the scale for confidentiality). I didn’t look at my slip until I got into the class and sat down and got settled. Then I had to do a double take and look at my notes where I keep my weekly weight. So I am SOOOOOOO happy about that. I did work very hard this week and was very conscious of what I put in my mouth plus I did some deliberate extra movement such as parking further away, despite the pain in my knee.

River (my hubby) was gone on a 4 day seminar and so I had a little bit of time to reflect on myself. It was good, I missed him but was able to get a some “me” time in. He had an amazing time and is a completely different person (in a good way). He was already supportive before but is even more so. In fact he is even going extreme as not eating beef anymore and wants to eat chicken and fish “on occasion”. This comes from a man who used to live for beef or meat in general. WOW! Also, no more coffee (for him) or cheese and lots of other things. It was a good seminar and even though I didn’t go I will have some benefits. I definitely would like to go the next time he is in town. P.S. He has a TV show on tonight called “Breakthrough with Tony Robbins” and it is on at 8 on NBC.

So I am definitely living in a supportive environment which is good for me. I am focusing on reaching my goals. I need to start setting other goals for myself now (other than just weight loss). I am working on balance actually and that is probably the hardest thing for me. My tree of life always has one branch about to snap because I put all my weight (effort and time) on that one branch and then the other branches sort of die. So I want all of my branches to be healthy and carrying me up and up and up.

I ask for your prayers to keep me going, keep me strong, and help me to focus on my balance. It is so very important for all of us to be balanced!
I will end it here as I promised to be brief but I do want to thank you all for your emails and your support. It means a lot to me even if I don’t always respond to every single one.
Have a good and balanced week!